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Carbon Leaf

"Let Your Troubles Roll By"

Love endures, it clings away
When asked to leave, it begs to stay
Like the perfect song, at imperfect times
It's the way the chords struck with the rhymes
So let your troubles roll by...

He knows he can help himself
He can tell by a look at the books on his shelf

And someone, somewhere loses her son
Before her own sunset is said and done

And she dreams of sunflowers bent-over
Frozen in snow, and thinks 'Colorado.. ?'
But then plays her life back in slow motion
To keep in touch with that raw emotion
In the night, crushed empty can
Olive Oyle is waiting for her man
To come in from the fight
That will change their life
'For good this time...'

When all of your tears dry, let your troubles roll by

Like New Year's Eve, tonight's underway
But tomorrow you'll wake up afraid of the day
'Cause underneath the scars of your broken dreams
An undone war still wages and stings
You fear the year will blow
Like a breeze through a rainbow
You swear it's there, but you can't grab a hold
So you sit and cry and wonder why, why...

When all of your tears dry, let your troubles roll by

So many cities and windows and lives
And through each one there's a soul that strives to survive
So pay no mind, my sorrow's fine
The day is a live and that's why I cry
It's a New Year's toast, grab your list to conspire
The last snake hissed as he was thrown in the fire
You've come far, and though you're far from the end
You don't mind where you are, cause you know where you've been

Like a culture vulture sprawled out on the floor
Like a dead devil sailor washed up on the shore
With nothing of note but the ole' Capt.'s coat
And a burning boat you just sank with your salty tears...

May. 19th, 2011

It's sad that shows that make unresolved sexual tension part of their formula frequently seem to fail when it comes to resolving the tension and dealing with the relationship.  Why do they seem to forget that they've done "married detectives who are into one another" successfully?  Nick and Norah Charles, Hart to Hart, McMillan and Wife... any of this sound familiar?  Could we Neflix them to the writers?  Then tend to wait until just after they've beaten the last vestiges of UST out of the couple and then try to have something "big" happen, but by then the storyline is so convoluted and the actors are so accustomed to "it" not happening that it just doesn't have the intense resolution the writers intend for it to have.  The feeling is never there with the intensity that a resolution like that should have.  I've really enjoyed how Deschanel and Boreanaz have played their roles and I hope that the writers let them just do their thing, because I do think the two of them still have the power to generate the affection needed.

Writer's Block: Living the dream

What is your ultimate dream job? Do you think you'll ever live the dream?

maybe...just maybe...

Writer's Block: A rose by any other name

Do you like your birth name? If you had the opportunity to change it, would you? What new name would you choose?

It's funny, for many years the answer to this question would have been an easy "yes". The name I would have chosen has varied from the exotic to the classic "Somsri, Raven, Elizabeth, Liz, Marie, Grace, Irene", and for the longest time, I really wanted to go by my middle name... Elizabeth... the knickname Liz feels right to me.  Even so, though I easily could have and had folks that were willing to work with me and allow me to tell them what I wanted to be called... I never had the guts to "do it", it always felt like it wasn't a decision to be left up to me.

As I've gotten older, though I wouldn't bestow my name on anyone, I am she and she is me and we are all together? LOL


So for lent, I'm giving up a list of things, in order to try to get more balance in my health and finances and in the hope that offering them up makes other things come to light.

1) Wheat (no bread, no pasta, no crackers, no tortillas, no chips, no wheat cereal)
2) Chocolate
3) Candy
4) Soda
5) Ice Cream
6) Cake
7) French fries
8) Peanuts/Peanut butter
9) Sliced Cheese and String Cheese
10) No Ebay, No Gymboree, No Amazon (except for 6th grade book- used)
11) Only presents for Stephen and birthday stuff for Truth, no non-essentials shopping or non tax refund planned shopping
12) Limited eating out (2x a week only)

3/28/09 Edit:
So far, I'm doing horrendously :(; though not necessarily every day... I just fall off the wagon... A LOT.  I've had pasta about 3 times, bread on a few other occasions and tortillas.   Candy and chocolate haven't been huge hurdles, but every so often I find myself in close proximity and ... scarf.  Soda, again, no where near "normal" but at a party or a restaurant... :(.  Ice Cream... ONCE :).  Cake... THREE TIMES.  French Fries (I forgot it was on the list the 1st time and then gave myself a free pass the 2nd and 3rd).  Peanut Butter, last week I was so hungry in the afternoon that I got out a spoon and ate a few spoonfuls from the jar in my file cabinet... TWICE.  Sliced cheese... only once.  Shopping... well, there's an entry devoted to shoe purchases and EBAY and I have clothed Moxie for the next year; Gymboree for a friend's shower and Amazon for 2 DVDs and a book.  Shopping has been BAD.  Have done much better with limited eating out.

All and all, not good... but, much better than "normal".  Maybe I'll just keep the list and try and and get to a holding pattern.
1) Eat smaller portions
2) Sew 1 project a month
3) Pay 6k to credit card, while not incurring additional debt to credit card
4) Crochet sweaters and blankets for Moxie and Truth's baby dolls
5) Read my gardening books and then, you know, garden LOL
6) Keep house tidy
7) Play with girls more
8) Walk or dance 3x a week

Wtih tax return:
1) fence side yard
2) buy portable dishwasher
3) Chicago

Tasha Alexander's Lady Emily Ashton series

And Also To Decieve
A Poisoned Season
A Fatal Walz: a Novel of Suspense

I found Tasha Alexander under the "if you bought this, you might like" on Amazon in response to the Deanna Raybourn books I've read.  I decided to give them a try since they were well reveiwed by readers and bought them used.

 Lady Emily Ashton is a strong headed young woman in the 1800s who marries to get away from her overbearing mother; at the time of her marriage she didnt' really care who she married and had little interest in getting to know her husband.  When he's killed a few months later, she grudgengly mourns, because she didn't really know or love him.  The first book "And Also To Decieve" chronicles the process of a woman falling in love with a husband she barely new, over a year after he dies.  In the process she solves a series of art theiveries and the answers some questions she didn't know needed answering.

"A Poisoned Season" is Lady Ashton coming out of mourning and embracing her own independence.  In this story, she finds herself victim to a jewel theif who is stealing from London's wealthy at the same time that a new pretender to the thrown of France has made himself a hit in London society.    We again follow her as she begins to unravel one mystery and find herself solving another she hadn't intended on solving.
"A Fatal Waltz" follows the political intrigue that ensues when a much disliked, but very powerful politician is murdered during a hunting party weekend.  Lady Ashton's best friend's husband stands accused and Lady Ashton makes a promise to prove him innocent and find the real killer.  With some close, very wealthy friends in tow, she goes to Vienna to try and track down a message that was sent to the victim before his death, in the process finding herself endangered and those close to her threatened.

Overall, I really enjoyed Alexander's writing.  It's everything Raybourn's is not... it's got depth, it's meaty, the characters feel much more like real people.  Lady Ashton is very independent and a bit of a free spirit (for the time) and it comes across comfortably.  She has relationships, but she's not dependent on others to get information for her, she doesn't fear seeking it out herself.  The first two books, where for the most part the mysteries being solved were fairly local in scope with a touch of political connectedness really work well, the twists and turns keep you turning the pages and caught up.  The third takes on political intrigue on the whole, and for me it actually doesn't work nearly as well.  The books are roughly about 350 pages in length.  It feels like she got really invovled in coming up with a plot and a story, then realized at about page 300 that she was nearing her "end point" and had to do a wrap up.  The story goes from being full into a really meaty and invovled situation, and suddenly the most mundane aspect of the story is the resolution and the story is over... but it doesn't feel like it should be.... and not in a good way.  I was actually left dissatisfied with the way it ended.


I'm giving it a try on Hulu.  I'd watched the first episode and while I felt that it held promise, it was a bit to expositional to get my attention, then, frankly, I forgot about it.  Today I saw an ad on Hulu for it and have been watching it again.  The only thing that concerns me about getting attached is that they've set up a "conspiracy" already... so unless they're going to drag us through a conspiracy for X amount of seasons... which seems to "kill" a series within 2-3 seasons, I don't know that this show is going to last very long.   I think Xfiles did it best when they mixed the conspiracy in gradually and then would go away from it for a few episodes.  We shall see.  I'm needing something to fill my CSI void... I still watch CSI, but now that the GSR is gone, I'm not quite as "taken up" with it... that and Spike isn't playing it 24/7 any more to allow me to default to it. LOL.

Coincidentally, I read this article today.  news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090429/sc_livescience/lonelyheartsfindcomfortintvcharacters  Whoa to hit close to home. LOL

Silent on the Moor by Deanna Raybourn

It's been a year, but I finally got to read the further adventures of Lady Julia Grey in Deanna Raybourn's newest installment of her "Silent on the _________" series, "Silent on the Moor".  I read it in a few days and enjoyed it, though again, it is very simple writing.  I've read mysteries that have much more complexity in style and language, so her writing tends to strike me as very... fluffy - but enjoyable.  We pick back up with our heroine, Lady Julia Grey, once again deciding to throw herself at Nicholas Brisbane, her would be lover (it's set in the mid-1800s and author sticks to the mores of that day) by accompanying her sister, uninvited, to help him set up his new estate.

She gets there and it's the usual push me/pull me back and forth, with her not taking no for an answer and him kissing her passionately one moment, and pushing her away for the next two chapters. LOL.  In some ways, I find it a bit maddening that in three books it's still the case that they're relationship is this way - though there is final resolution at the end of it.  More annoying is that the Author sets Brisbane up almost as an omnipotent character.  Julia begins to investigate strange goings on at the estate and as things begin to be unravelled, at almost every turn, RIDICULOUSLY, it turns out that Brisbane ALREADY KNOWS what she's discovered and frequently just couldn't be bothered to tell her *rolls eyes*. 

I'm not a superfeminist by any means and I am ridiculously romantic at times (I shipped GSR for 9 years... MSR too)... but I found myself wanting to send a copy of "He's Just Not that Into You" back in time for a great deal of the book.  The resolution is wonderfully romantic... but the way he treats her for most of the book was really irritating to me.   I know from misunderstood heroes, but the author takes it a step further... his actions are openly disrespectful and demoralizing to the heroine... and yet the ending has him do a completely romantic about face. 

The mystery itself is entertaining, focusing on the dark secrets of a family that is caving in on itself.  Truth be told, with some careful readjusting to allow for the confirmation of evidence moments, the author could have cut the character of Brisbane out and made for a much better paced mystery.

Again, liked the mystery and I liked the romantic ending, but had one major niggle.

Well rip my lips off and call me smacky... it only took me a few clues to realize that the books I've been expecting more meat from are actually romance novels.  I don't think that the publisher originally was going to market them that way, but someone in the romance section of the company must have read them and realized "hey, this is a romance novel without the smut LOL.  The three books by Raybourn have new very "romance novel" covers and the author herself seems quite happy about it and in retrospect... she actually seems quite the romance novel writing "type" if you get my meaning.  Very romantic in ideas and just... puts on that certain air LOL.